Relationship Q&A

The topic “relationships” could have gone in so many different ways. I thought a Q&A would be a fun way to answer any questions that you may have. Disclaimer: I am NOT a relationship expert. I am just giving some insight on what I have learned from previous relationships and what has helped me. 

Q1: How’s your relationship with Jesus going? 


Progressing every day! Jesus is my #1 homie. Relationships take work and especially the relationship you have with Jesus. Jesus does not howl at you to talk to him, that is a choice that you make each day. When I became a Christ-follower, I was unsure of how to build a relationship with Jesus. Later on my walk, I found out that you have to insert Jesus to your day. It is my responsibility to set aside times throughout my day to worship Jesus. Now, all I ever do is talk, talk, and talk to God. 

Q2: What if I have faith in my relationship with God but still doubt it at the same time? 


There is a story found in Matthew, Jesus is sleeping during a storm and his disciples are freaking out. The call-out to Jesus to save them and Jesus replies, “You of little faith, why are you so afraid?” Then he got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm.” Our relationship with Christ is determined by our faith. If we can believe in God’s word and what the Bible teaches and still have doubts? That’s when God questions how strong our faith is. Throw your fears at God, tell him what is causing you to doubt and concerns you are dealing with. He wants you to go to him, he can handle it! The enemy wants you to doubt God’s promises, which leads us to feel distant from God. 

Q3: List what’s most important in a relationship for you.

  1. Loves Christ / Has a personal relationship with Christ

  2. Leading me more towards Christ

  3. Shared Values (going to church, serving, giving, family, kids)

  4. Personality

  5. Appearance


Q4: Do you believe that everyone has a soulmate, or “the one” they are destined to be with?


I would love to believe that God created someone just for me. That would be so awesome! I do believe in “the one” and the one is who you choose to do life with. The cool thing about God, he allows us to choose who we love, grow with, sharpen, and build relationships with Christ. The person I say “I do” to is my choice from God. 

Q5: How do you know they are the one?


Ask yourself: 

Is this person pouring value in my life?

Do we share common goals? 

Does this person push me or bring excitement in my life? 

Can I share how I feel without being judged or criticized? 

Do your future goals align? 

Q6: Is it important for your spouse to have a good relationship with your family?


Most definitely! You are not just saying “I do” to your spouse but also to their family. You’ll be attending family events, birthdays, and holidays with them. Relationships take time. Learn about them, respect their beliefs, and embrace their culture. You would not want to enter a marriage with someone and their family barely knows anything about you or they are unsure about you. That will just lead to problems in your relationship with your spouse. 

Q7: Do you feel your spouse has to be on the same spiritual level as you, and have the same beliefs as you?


If you are married or dating a Christian and they are not at the same spiritual level as you then learn and grow together. Maybe you feel like you are at a “higher” level than them and you feel like their faith can improve. Well, instead of thinking that way, think about ways you can push their faith. Pray with them and share with them ways they can improve their relationship with God. 

I do 100% believe that for a relationship to honor God, you must have the same beliefs. Marriage is a sacred covenant to God. When you marry, your souls become one. God wants your relationship to succeed. If you are married or dating someone with a different belief or no beliefs at all, that’s not honoring to God. You would be seeing things in two different views instead of one. The believer could easily drift from God or let go of that relationship. 

Q8: Why do guys tend to hide their true feelings?


I would LOVE to know the answer to this one! LOL! God designed females and males differently. For us ladies, sharing our feelings comes out naturally. For men, we may have to ask them “what do you think or how do you feel” for them to share. Men can express love differently. They might fill up your tank of gas and to you, that’s just them doing something nice but for them, it could mean “I love you.” I think it’s so important for EVERY couple to ask their partner what their love language is. I’ll put the quiz below. 

https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/



Q9: How do you find closure with your ex without contacting them?


I used to think I needed “closure” for me to move on. I later realized that we do not need it at all. All closure does is make the situation more complicated. It’s like you are hanging on to something that what supposed to be let go. If you are not in contact with your ex, there must be a reason for that. Maybe the relationship did not end too well or maybe you both realized that the relationship just simply was not working. Maybe you are afraid to move on or you just do not know how to. Use this time to find you instead of searching for something that does not want to be searched. Journal. Read a book. Go for a run. Start a hobby. Read the Bible. Talk to a friend. Allow your mind to be focused on you. The best things in life are discovered when you are growing in a relationship with yourself. Sooner or later, you will discover that you were never really seeking closure, you were just after something that God already closed the chapter to. 


I would love to do more Q&A's! Let me know what you think!

xx,

D

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